Sometimes to bleed is to wake.
Like how the fishmonger unsheathes his blade,
dusting off specks of ice from the gaping eye
of the grouper. Frozen in a state of rambunctious stupor,
suspended in placid remembrance.
Memory’s sweetness cloyed onto an iris,
a sweetness from nights before spent nestled
in the warmth of communion,
of laughter perfuming the air taking me back home.
Home, a hearth of bodies alight.
Home, where selves do not smelt but warm to the
waft of fish steamed by my grandfather.
Steamed from a vision clouded and sweat stained.
Steamed out of generations who lurched nets into the sea out of love,
out of pressing food to lines of hungry offspring,
out to a soup I gulp heartily,
down so fast my desolate gullet burns,
stinging and unceasing because to pain
is to wake and to burn is to
cling
onto a vision of love.
Onto land even as waves unmoor me,
untether me from the dream where I am
bundled again in the taste of home,
cusped within those wok warmed arms.
I turn from sleep,
parched by aching,
unsated by memory,
and watch as blood seeps.
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